He his-self's Blog

We are fortunate that Scotland has the very best agricultural show in the UK. Yesterday had a real buzz about it, peoples heads are not down trying to survive anymore, they are up and looking to a bright future.

The show has it all, superb livestock, all types of machinery, food, clothes, forestry, renewable energy, climate change, agricultural research, education, a new single government agency (Scottish Environment And Rural Services) and much much more besides. A most pleasing sight were the thousands of schoolchildren and a few harassed teachers joyously exploring and learning all about food and agriculture while thinking they were having  a fun day out.

I did not agree with some of the stuff on climate change see http://www.macaulay.ac.uk/videos/cc/

It might have helped if they had asked some real experts (me for a start) about what will happen in the future. All of the above scenarios are fanciful at best and do not reflect what farmers are actually doing now and real achievable plans for the future. The vision of rosy cheeked happy communities got right up my snout as one who has actually had to deal with the "community" and deliver real change.

The bankers were smiling, mine anyway, the rest of the economy might be flat but the rural sector in general has a very bright future. We have a government that has the right general idea for the rural areas but still has not got delivery of those ideas particularly the SRDP on track yet. Farmers were smiling even machinery dealers the most notoriously miserable of men couldn't help the odd sly grin. Its great to be a farmer just now.

Part of the joys of farming in the north are the long days we get here, sunrise is at 4AM and sunset after 10PM. It give us a chance to relax outside when when the weather is good and work in the office when it is not. 

I have been pondering the direction our business should take after a conversation with a Government official. The SRDP system here has been a total failure so far and I was trying to find out why. After a long talk, the exasperated civil servant said " the scheme is not for your benefit, its to put money into things we want you to do" The poor civil servant clearly did not like the fact that rural people might have ideas and priorities of our own and we might think their ideas and objectives were total nonsense. It is clearly going to be almost impossible for farmers to get any sort of support or benefit into the real rural economy with this scheme. As we are one of the lucky ones to have survived this far my attitude is hardening that the government is the enemy, not to be trusted, certainly not believed in its propaganda and probably best ignored. So I have decided to use an agent for any further dealings with the SRDP despite the costs involved, they are of course much less honest than me but will therefore be much more successful. We will use the SRDP to build real food producing capacity, the exact opposite of what it is clearly intended for. I think almost everyone else will do the same. I must be getting much more awkward as the market is now a better bet than any environment support scheme. This change in attitude is going to lead to a lot of trouble as both consumers and government have failed to see the world has changed.

I cannot compete with Kansasfarmer for the size of hail or volume of rain but I bet we have him beat on temperature, it was 5C here this morning and the freezing level will be below the mountain summits all day, June better get my wellies washed for the Highland.

At last after 6 dry weeks a wet day, this gives rise to 2 worries, will it know when to stop and fly strike. The good thing about a blog is how odd each of my postings look a few weeks later, worries about the  wet replaced by panic about crop emergence in the dry, so it is worth keeping it up.

Sowing is all done after one of the latest toughest seasons I have ever known. Yields will be well down but at least we will have a harvest, I had my doubts about that earlier. Calving is almost over and all the heifers are finished and have been no trouble. Lambing is a distant memory and now the thought of it is almost bearable again. Lamb numbers are significantly lower than last year due to the awful weather. Costs are higher too, the rise in meat prices will have to continue or headage payments return however for us to last much longer. The amount of work and grief in keeping sheep needs to be better rewarded to ease the £80 a week in quad fuel alone.

Work on the wind project is taking more and more of my time. The problems are similar to farming (bureaucracy, laziness and greed) but are more easily solved as we are in a profitable industry and competition in the rapidly growing market is cutthroat. Deals and offers can be changed very quickly and knowing when to sign up takes nerve and a lot of advice. We are on  the way to a major change in our lives in terms of income so it will be interesting to look back over this time  and remember how hard it was to achieve.

You know its wet when your 4 wheel drive quad with all four wheels locked slides down a gentle slope pirouetting gracefully when you step off to look at a ewe. You know its wet when walking across a 30 degree slope you realise you are still ankle deep in water. You know its wet when your neighbours lambing shed has a ships life ring hanging outside. You especially know its wet when you have time to spend 3 days online with the SRDP online submissions system. The weather has been appalling with weeks of snow followed by rain and a total absence of sun. I hope extreme drought follows as I would welcome the different challenge.

All that said spring cannot be too far away as we are at mid April and the days are longer. Fieldwork is of course on hold but the lime is on and the seed is waiting for the drill. I have not mentioned the windfarm much as I got such a hard time over it earlier on but the works have commenced and we hope to be completed by October. The fall in the value of the pound has cost us over £100k but has also boosted income by 10% so we are probably better off long term.

This is just a short update as we are lambing, an update on that will follow after I have erased all the bad bits from my memory.

It is dry so now we move to spring/summer work routine, longer days mean more gets done and boy does it need to. We have 400 ewes to lamb 40 cows to calve and 100 acres to sow not much individually but enough when your time is split to convince you you will never finish anything. Our first lamb arrived today, its only a month early so I should not be too surprised there always seems to be one. No calves yet but some cows look not  too far off. There are some heifers which can easily fool me as they never look ready but just produce something rat sized and then flee to the far end of the farm in terror at the prospect of motherhood. Then  they seem overcome with remorse and sit on the calf when reunited, sucklers are very bad for my sanity at times.

Ploughing has been made a bit easier with the purchase of a certain bargain supermarkets 1/2in drive impact socket. I expected poor quality but have been pleasantly surprised, it is so good no 3 son (12) is willing to change all the plough parts. The plough which cost me £450 seven years ago and arrived as a very unpromising collection of parts on two pallets has cost about £375 a year in wear parts since. I know ploughing is expensive compared to min til but at those figures I will take a bit more convincing to change to it. Last year we tried a 3m Simba express and 180hp was not enough to shift it let alone get the required speed for soil mixing but it was a good system when 220hp was in front of it and much faster than ploughing. I will wait until they are out of fashion and buy one for the next tractor upgrade.

On the family front the last of no5s paperwork has come through and she now has both a citizen certificate and a passport. Only about £1000 for that lot due to more fees for documents and fees. Parenthood is expensive but adoptive parenthood is extortionate with the main money grabber our glorious government.

I have been a bit busy lately, it has actually stopped raining and as the land is fit to travel on we are spreading muck on the arable fields before ploughing.

Sunshine and dry days do wonders for the spirit of optimism. In that spirit and after seeing our analysis results I decided to get the lime on now. Delivery was arranged and I was asked can you take an artic load. Yes was my smug reply, that was my first mistake. At  5PM after a day at muck I was just driving the forklift out of the straw store to bed cattle when 3 fields away I saw an artic and bulk trailer turn very slowly off the road. Not up my road, not indeed up any road but up a very narrow track leading to a bridge that consisted of two planks and a prayer. Stop forklift, phone out of pocket to lime supplier STOP the truck, what do you mean, you subbied it out and you don't have a number! Onto quad roar off in pursuit up track to find neighbours pickup already behind truck but no artic driver. Driver reappears says he went find the farm on foot as he thought things were getting a bit tight! Point out bridge, neighbour points out bridge, after severe persuasion he agrees death is likely if bridge crossed. Trucker now has to reverse a fully laden bulker up hill along a track and out. Does he succeed? No, tractor unit slides off and into my field crushing my fence, neighbour leaves. Survey situation, herself and all 5 arrive to watch chaos. Decide to retreat as outnumbered, suggest recovery vehicle (no way will I offer a tractor, artics cost £100k and I am not bending one) Take no4 to dancing lesson. Arrive back an hour later in pitch darkness to see recovery truck arrive, retire to house, go eventually to bed, get out  of bed  on hearing truck arrive, trucker says he will leave off tipping till "morning" Back to bed, 4.30AM trucker arrives back hooks up turns round and pops back to sleep in the cab, I did not, finally get up at 6.30 and insist he tip and leave!

9AM call truckers transport manager, a very world weary guy who has no doubt heard every disaster story ever agrees to pay for damages to fence. Go to muck, 9.30AM next truck (8 wheeler) arrives tips and destroys cattle pen gate on exit. Some days you just cant win.

Sunday the 27th of January is holocaust memorial day and I would like to take a little time to mark it with the story of Jane Haining.

My mother is from a farm near the small village of Dunscore in Dumfrieshire. The farms remain in the hands my Uncle and his sons. My Grandfather Grandmother and Mother knew the Haining family.

Jane Haining worked in the Scottish Mission  to the Jews in Budapest. Over 400 children attended it for the excellent education it provided. When WW2 broke out she was safe in Scotland but returned to Hungary to help the Jewish Children. This is what she said about some of them.'We have one nice little mite who is an orphan and is coming to school for the first time. She seems to be a lonely wee soul and needs lots of love. We shall see what we can do to make life a little happier for her.'  and 'We have one new little six-year-old, an orphan without a mother or a father. She is such a pathetic wee soul to look at and I fear, poor lamb, has not been in too good surroundings before she came to us .. she certainly does look as though she needs heaps and heaps of love.' 

In 1944 she was again ordered to leave as the *** had invaded Hungary, her response was 'If these children need me in the days of sunshine', she said, 'how much more do they need me in the days of darkness?

She was gassed in Auschwitz on August 16th 1944 at the age of 47.

Among the memorials to her is plaque on the wall of Dunscore church. The church where I was baptised.

 Remember Reflect React HMD 08

As adoptive parents we have to have regular contact with our social worker to check on the progress of No5. The social worker is a lovely woman but I cannot help feeling a bit " on trial" much more so than any farm assurance or SGRIPD inspection. Our new daughter is doing exceptionally well and growing in every possible way so there is nothing to fear but it is still an ordeal, which after the next meeting will be over for ever.

Farm wise we have been busy loading out cattle and bringing in their replacements. The soil is too wet for much in the way of fieldwork so we have a lot more muck to spread and then ploughing to start. Dry weather would be very welcome but the days are noticeably longer and I hope it is not too far off. No 1 son is now a big help and still enthusiastic enough to enjoy mucking cattle courts with the telehandler, so far both court and handler have escaped serious damage. He is actually looking forward to spring work and hoping to get his hands on the Fastrac. We will see what happens nearer the time he has exams and a car driving test to sit so study must come first.

I attended another meeting where people were shown farms in Canada. My family has been there since the 19th century and my brother and cousin are citizens. The salesman did not oversell the country but certainly did not bring up all the bad points (not much of a salesman if he did) I would like to say some things to those who are thinking of going.

 I admire your courage, I could not do it but a small dose of my families cynicism and greed might be helpful.

1 There is no cheap land in Canada especially for immigrants you will pay too much, most pay 3x local price the smart pay 2x and only the very ruthless and cynical pay the real local price.

2 Be hard hearted, the seller may be a great old guy but it is not your job to buy him a house in Florida. Start at $200 an acre stop at $450 and these are productive acres not sloughs bush or scrub.

3 Get your own realtor and lawyer, do not allow one to represent both buyer and seller.

4 You may have many reasons for going but despising change and immigrants here should not be one of them; you are about to become one yourself.

5 Hopper bottom bins are essential unless you really really like shoveling.

6 Buy a good comfortable second hand car you will spend a very long time behind the wheel 7 or 8 hour drives are common.

7 Houses, these are often worthless insist they are up to code and that furnaces, heating ducts and sewage are all in tip top condition. Not too mention wells water systems etc

8 Cellars (basements) flood and then collapse. Be warned!

9 -40c is not a dry cold, it is bloody torture.

10 You can only really expect 100 farming days a year. Work accordingly, this is not a place for a relaxed lifestyle.

11 Do not borrow money

12 No, I mean it, do not borrow money.

13 Homesickness can literally break your heart.

14 Do not buy the machinery, sadly most of it is crap and after all if it was good why are they selling?

15 The kids will be Canadian and will look at you as if you are nuts when you talk about the old country.

16 Do not start every conversation with the words "when we"

17 You will be laughed at in the coffee shop for your mistakes, accept it you will make plenty.

18 Finally I admire your courage tenacity  and sheer bloody mindedness you will need it and when you are used to it Canada is the finest place in the world.

I hope I have not offended anyone or put them off

PS I went to the meeting to see who was thinking of selling so I can offer first

Herself

As we are part of the adoption circle with many friends spending yet another lonely, childless Christmas, desperate to get back to work as soon as possible it made me reflect on the wonders of family celebrations.

This year hisself announced that the Christmas tree lights were far too dangerous and could not be used. He was fearing yet another fire and as I refuse to approach any shop, for anything but food in December, our tree went up without lights this year. However we failed to point this out to the dogs. The tree stands in the hall and in the darkness one of the hounds forgot its existence and collided with the the tree. Dog naturally escaped unharmed but the tree fell over breaking in the process every single glass and crystal ornament we had gathered over the years. When finally uprighted it was a sad sight with all these strings attached to a glass hoop and nothing much else.

Even sadder was the fact that I was in no condition to even bother being upset. As soon as the schools closed I went down with exhaustion and something that made every single bone in my body scream agony. I was more interested in getting the floor cleared so I could make my way back to bed than worrying about the damage. I was so ill that eating was too painful and am now very proud to announce that the festive feast has made me loose another kilo from the waistline.

Somehow, between the naps, the Christmas dinner got cooked. This is the season we truly bless our multicultural heritage as we have mixed the traditions to get a lovely Yule time for all the family. In Finland people eat Christmas dinner on the Xmas eve and Santa visits shortly after. Which means that by the time you sit down to eat the kids are far too wound up to eat anything and after Santa you cannot get them to bed. As the Xmas church service is next morning at six, you really want them to bed as one must be in church in time to avoid sitting under the chandelier.

[In that service the churches use the old chandeliers with real candles and it is so beautiful. But candles drip wax and tradition, not to mention the weather, means that most people are wearing fur coats. Real fur coats, not fake ones. Wax on fur leaves rather nasty bold patches on your best piece of mink - not funny at all. If you enter into the church at the right moment you can see everyone seated and clear circles of empty seats have appeared from nowhere just under the chandeliers.]

Here in UK I found myself kicking the turkey into the oven while Grandparents were having a fantastic time playing with the kids and the new toys, not to mention eating countless sweeties and when it came time to serve up my hours of slave labour in front of the, Aga no-one was that interested, rather more looking forward to a nap in front of the telly.

So now we eat on Christmas eve, when all are hungry and interested in the food. I cook every wish anyone is willing to make plus our traditional favourites. Santa arrives the next morning leaving me playing all day with my happy children [I have spent the whole day building Lego]. For lunch; a selection of cold meats from the deli counter, heated up extra roast potatoes from the night before and leftover salad. Bingo! No hassle, no stress and no time involved.

The hot question is: "what did I get from Hisself?", - well he did take me round the livestock on the quad on Xmas morning, all the way to the lamb field frozen pond where I was treated to some doughnuts on the quad [not the eating kind]. That man knows how to show a girl good time!!!! My real present is a day in the sales. Hisself will be looking after the kids while patiently showing interest on every item I try on and then paying for it all without a murmur.

At last some proper weather, - 8C here last night and up to a balmy - 2C during the day. So emptying cattle courts is top priority, not easy with a load a week off to kill just now. Clipping belly's has to be one of the most dangerously unpleasant jobs known to man. Cattle can provide endless ways of getting you injured, their latest method involved one Belgian Blue getting his head stuck in a barrier wrenching it free then charging into the side of the crush with it, an hour later order and the Blue was restored. I will be glad to see him go tomorrow.

Outside stock is loving this weather with the cows particularly smug as they savour the sunshine and dry bed. They get a mix of silage and wheat straw and mostly leave the straw so a rethink in feed will be required for next year. The ewes are now much easier to feed since the numbers were cut and are still on hay only.

Herself is busy with preparations for the kids Christmas Ball (senior and junior) which involves kilts, long dresses and in some cases stretch limos. I will see if I can persuade her to blog about it later.

Herself's Christmas edition.

My mother always said, that breaking china brought good luck. After dropping a plate from my grandparent's wedding service the night before my Higher maths exam and achieving a high B, I have been inclined to believe her.

So I dropped a pie dish while putting it into the dishwasher. That was caused by taking His-self shopping. I buy in bulk, but having No5 strapped to my front lifting 25kg bag of rice or 15kg of washing powder is not as easy as it used to be. So I lure His-self to the wholesalers for the heavier stuff. This time he spotted peppermint tea. After a while he decided to try it and we came home with tester of 160 tea bags. Needless to say, he did not like the taste. Not wanting to waste any, he swapped my usual morning first herbal to peppermint and after a week the "cleansing" effect of was obvious. What used to be my digestive tract was now a giant gas driven machine gun. That is how I came to drop the dish.

The next morning [Monday it was] No3 [son] got up first, switched on the kitchen light and had an immediate shower of sparks and flame. The strip-light was on fire and the house in darkness, the fuses doing what fuses should in a crisis. No harm done, except the smell and frantic chaos trying to get everyone to school on time in the dark.

No3 is doing his first year in the Secondary school and his classes include home economics. He is one seriously food allergic child and takes a lot of his own ingredients to the practical cooking classes. The week before they made an upside down cake. He forgot to mention the fact till the last minute. Usually he measures what he needs into plastic bags but I had no option but to send him to school with full packs of his special baking powder, xhantam gum and flour. For some reason he forgot his special pack into the science department later that day.

This "lucky" Monday he was baking again, but had forgotten to find his ingredient bag from last week. In the panic I had no option but to send him to school with my last bit of cream of tartar and ask in the school office if anyone had handed in the bag he needed.

While His-self was restoring our kitchen lighting later that morning I got a call from No3 "Mum No1 [son] brought my bag home last week, can you bring it out to me in an hour?"

I went and I looked - no sign of the bag. I Called No1 [son] "I hear you were really kind and borough No3's stuff home. Where did you put it?" No!1: "Cannot remember, but it is not in any silly place like under my bed." - "Yes son, I know, I looked. Where else could it be?" No1: "In the kitchen." - "Nope." No1: "Maybe I put in in the dog bed or in the bag with my sport shoes?" - "Looked both places, not there. Go find you brother and tell him it cannot be found."

When No3 came home and I enquired about his day. What a tale I got! The cream of tartar opened in his bag and could not be used. So he made a batch of ordinary muffins and gave them to No2 [daughter] to eat in chemistry revision. He had never imagined that breaking an egg was so difficult - took him 15 minutes.

My day was yet to get even better. This time a call from a friend. She is a good friend, a sensible woman, a nice person with both personality and sense of humour. Could I look after her daughter for couple of hours. My brain screaming NO and His-self looked like rabbit in the headlights when I heard my mouth uttering "Of course I can." This child is an absolute pain: she goes and lets the dogs run away, she criticises me and especially my ability to clean [I am not saying she is not right there...] and marches through the worst mud in her boots and before I can turn round I find her sitting on the living room sofa, cross legged and with the wellies still ON.

The lesson of my tale: Peppermint tea can ruin any good omen!

Sorry I have not had much time for the blog lately. No5 is keeping us all busy. Last week was The Party. Two weeks of frantic cooking, cleaning, painting, repairing and general mayhem in preparation for her baptism. One stott, one pig and a large salmon all played their part as well. The food was magnificent and enjoyed by all, with enough leftovers for a food parcel for grandparents on their return South. All our friends and family attended and it was great to see them.

The weather up here has been extreme with high winds, high temperatures and massive rainfall, sometimes all at once. I have never seen this farm so wet, even the slopes are awash with water. We winter cattle outside so we have been very busy moving feeders to avoid poaching and soil damage. Frost must come soon, please?

We still have not received our compensation for FM from the Scottish government. However we have our SFP, so we should be grateful for that. We have cut our sheep numbers, a decision that has proved to be very wise as our buyer has cut the price yet again. We are witnessing the end of the sheep industry due to short-sighted pricing by the supermarkets suppliers.

The long winter period of maintenance, and renewal is underway. The problem with that is that I cannot find half the tools. No3 [son] is proving to be excellent natural mechanic and has started welding very well at 11. He says it is easy. I am going to have to start buying him his own stuff so he will stop borrowing and hiding mine [he does not trust me with the good stuff].

I am hoping to get back to the blog a bit more now. It all depends how well No5 sleeps. She is now growing very well and 75% of the British female population will end up shorter than her, she is going to be a big girl! 

It is the season of the farm sale or roup in the local area. I have now been to a good number and they seem to split into two distinct groups, tenants and owner occupiers. In general the tenanted ones are sad affairs with a generations old tackle and an air of defeat about them. Even if the farmer has lived to retire the prospect of the sale supplying a good pension is slim. The local farming community does what it can by paying sometimes well above new price for the kit worth anything at all but they know it will total up to very little.  Contrast the owner occupiers sale, even if the sale is the result of a death or illness there is an air of satisfaction that at least those who follow will have something to help them retire or start again with the next generation. Land values have split  tenant's of small farms into a sort of rural underclass with no way out and no collateral to expand when faced with competition from larger mixed tenure units.

Lamb sales have been proceeding steadily with us and the price continues to fall relentlessly, the last lot away had the lowest average price for organic lamb I have ever received. It cannot continue like this so we have decided to cut sheep numbers yet again. We will not purchase any replacements and cull as heavily as possible, the land freed up will go to wheat. I doubt we will see the same high prices for wheat next year but I can lock in a profit now I cannot say the same for lamb.

Our aged Toyota is still in surgery but I am assured it will recover, the delay being due to their being three different types of pipe required and only two arriving so far. This has not bothered herself at all as she has taken over "my" 4x4 and seems very reluctant to let me have it back, the only exception being to take "Gerald" to the local abattoir and thence via the local butcher to our freezer. I usually have to ask a couple of times for help to move stock but when he was loaded everyone turned out to help unprompted, I wonder why?

A chance to catch up on things, its all been a bit of a blur since coming back. Last Saturday saw us finish harvest with the last of the spring wheat cut and the straw baled and wrapped. Add in loading out barley and oats plus storing feed and seed for over winter and you get one harassed and distracted farmer.

No2 [daughter] spotted a leak in our 12-year-old minibus. Many years of farm tracks, sales and green stuff has taken its toll. Unfortunately it is an import and so it will take several weeks to source and then transport the parts, probably directly from Japan. This has meant a rather costly and unplanned purchase of another vehicle. How people can ever afford a new one is beyond me as this one has depreciated £14 000 in just three years. We went down the line of various makes and bought the only one the baby did not cry in. Not perhaps the most usual method but it worked for us.

The title does not refer to the relentless diet of bad news since my return but to another type of diet more of which later. The treatment of Scots farmers by DEFRA has been quite appalling and goes well beyond what I thought a democratic government capable of. We must get at least equal treatment from Westminster or a new clearances will ensue with some dire and unpredictable consequences. The seriousness of the situation and the resolve of those caught up in it seems to have been totally underestimated by Mr Benn. I have no idea what will happen only that something must. People are furious.

The diet refers to the latest obesity scare. I was one of those that thought this was all rubbish but we have now been visiting the local health centre with No5. There is of course absolutely nothing wrong with her, but every single department of the NHS must have that confirmed in triplicate. Every part of the various departments we visited was full of morbidly obese OAPs, adults and worst of all children. Some of whom were so breathless from the exertion of walking in the door I feared they would die right in front of us. The urban diet is clearly broken. We must fix it somehow and as a food producer I feel I have some responsibility to try and do something. Suggestions would be welcome.

People who have adopted always say they get intrusive and inappropriate comments. Being an over 6ft fit farmer, in rigger boots and boiler suit with the sleeves rolled up and the scars clearly visible with a babe in my arms, oddly enough I have not had a single one. Is it me?

By Herself - He his-self is busy with the tail end of harvest so I thought to leave him a little surprise......

We have been home a week now and the turn of the month brought the bank statement. While in China I utilized the ATM machine network. Whenever the purse was empty I simply filled it with another 1000 RMB. As He his-self has explained I did shop good style. Nine pairs of shoes and the kiddie clothes just for starters. I soon figured out that I could buy nice things for No2 [daughter] but they were not available in the size for No4 [daughter]. However the tailor down the road could copy anything in 24 hours and we soon developed a lovely, close relationship. No need to worry, I did not neglect our sons either.

I also have a bad habit of buying pictures, usually large ones. His-self quite expected me to come home with a large silk print but he had a small fit when I got eight original pictures about harvest and animals in Guangdong countryside. It was quite a funny situation as a large, ginger tom was sleeping on the shop doorstep and we could spot three more inside. His-self is seriously allergic to cats so he took part to the proceedings outside the shop window while I went inside. I just could not decide. I wanted the ones with the cows and the sheep [OK maybe the water buffaloes and the goats] and the harvest scenes, not to mention the traditional wedding...The shop keeper assured me that eight was a lucky number while his-self turned purple behind the glass making more and more desperate gestures.

Anyway, the transactions are all through and my total spending??? Slightly under £300.

Baby presents keep arriving with kind people popping in for a short second. The fun part of being a farmer's wife is the contact with other farmers. There is an element of surprise in every event. I imagined I had seen it all but today our No5 was gifted a trailer brake coupling. His-self was very pleased, apparently it was a gift worth £40. No5 is none the wiser but she has obviously been accepted into the community as a farm kid like every other. That is the way we like it.