It appears that our pal Farmer Frank - who's well known to some of the users of these forums - has got a bit of a fan club!

Speaking of which, we're hoping to persuade Farmer Frank to do a "live surgery" on these forums on the evening of June 19 - answering forum members' queries. Put the date in your dairy!

Tim.Relf:

Speaking of which, we're hoping to persuade Farmer Frank to do a "live surgery" on these forums on the evening of June 19 - answering forum members' queries. Put the date in your dairy!

How much is it worth?

farmer frank:

How much is it worth?

Twenty quid and free beer for the evening.

Tim.Relf:

Twenty quid and free beer for the evening.

Chuck in a couple of pickled eggs and you've got yourself a deal...

farmer frank:

Chuck in a couple of pickled eggs and you've got yourself a deal...

Done!

Tim.Relf:

Done!

You have been! You don't know how much beer I can drink in an evening. Or what I smell like after a couple of pickled eggs!

Beer and pickled eggs, just as well its on line

Is Farmer Frank doing his bit for emissions?

Get him to stay in the right field, and it might save having to apply sulphur - and nitrogenous liquid, come to think of it.

2658336:

Get him to stay in the right field, and it might save having to apply sulphur - and nitrogenous liquid, come to think of it.

I can't camp in my condition. I need a firm bed these days.

He his-self:

Beer and pickled eggs, just as well its on line

Is Farmer Frank doing his bit for emissions?

Funny you should say that, He his-self. My neighbour says I'm full of hot air. 

To be honest, I think she's got a soft spot for me. I might ask her if she wants spend some time alone with me. I've got some calves to castrate next week - I might see if she wants to come along... 

Sir, you sound like a man of great intelligence and experience, with your knowledge i believe that my leader could employ you as his mentor, are you open to offers of employment on a long term basis? He needs some sound advice and i am led to believe that you are the man.

I look forward to your reply,

Yours Sincerely

Ivor Biggen. (aka Bonehead) 

bonehead:

Sir, you sound like a man of great intelligence and experience,

Dear Mr Biggen,

Thank you for your kind words - you're obviously a very good judge of character. I've seen a few things in my time, I can tell you. 

I will consider all offers of employment, although can't guarantee completing the work.

FF

Sir, before i offer you my assistence in introducing you to my leader, i do not want to burden you, as a man with your intellect and stature does not deserve, but i first must warn you of the the unproffessional ways and mannerisms and waste of time my leader puts me through every day, if you could cast aside his daily misdemeanors and help him see the error of his ways and take him under your wing then i'm sure a fruitful prosperous relationship could be created and maintained, as for compensation for your many troubled days ahead, the offer of peanuts is on the table.

Yours sincerley

Ivor Biggen