Black Sheep Blog

The Black Sheep is watching its back for a black panther, after two recent separate sightings in Leicestershire. This Panther is apparently bigger than a large alsation, and in a phrase of poetry not usually accustomed to police offices; the panther was described as being 'silhouetted against the skyline. Apparently there could be no mistake in identification.

One could be dubious and say it was a big Labrador, an oversized Styrian Coarse Haired Hound (they exist, read it and weep)or maybe the work of an overactive imagination. Either way, the Black Sheep is on the look out.

Unfortunately the Black sheep couldn't attend last weekend's YFC soiree in Torquay (we were hiding from potential panther attacks), but the Sheep couldn't go by without commentating on some of the pictures.

A friend of Mr Farmlife called Guy emailed him today after seeing our coverage of the chezza. He said he was sure Chesney had a famous dad and so all day the office has been searching to find out who it could be.

Guy finally revealed that his dad is in fact from the band the tremeloes. I know i have never heard of them either but still what pop pedigree.

Within the Farmers Weekly collection on YouTube, there have been two videos that have created more debate than when Mr Food Chain said that Days of Thunder was better than Top Gun (which it blatantly isn't).

We are not averse to a bit of cuteness in the office from time to time, so there was a united "ahhhh" upon reading this article.

The orphaned baby owls are kept warm by the toy owl and it makes a beautiful picture.

I often think about bringing in a cardboard cut-out of myself into the office to make me look busy when i want to chill out.

I think people in the office would already say though that i am already a bit like flimsy cardboard though...

I had to do a double-take when i read the title of this story today.

I then read that Westlife was going to promote milk in the Milk Moustache campaign. I would say it's the only chance they will get to have a moustache but that would be cruel and the Sheep is anything but that...

The yearly cheese fest (sorry i mean Eurovision music show) is again upon us; this year in beautiful Finland. All week the office has been laughing at the more extravagant lyrics used in this year's show.

My personal favourite is the Ukraine's entry Dancing Lasha Tumbai, which reminded me very much of the Beatles in their heyday (or on second thoughts maybe not):

Hello everybody!
My name is Verka Serduchka
Me
English
Don't understand!
Let's speak DANCE!

Mr News Editor likes Russia's entry, a raunchy little number which could be compared to Shakespeare's love sonnets:

"Oh, don't call me funny bunny
I'll blow your money, money
I'll get you to my bad ass spinning for you"

England have of course got SCOOCH...to be honest i think the name says it all!!

Working for Farmers Weekly can be a tiring job (especially having to listen to Mr Food Chain all day long!!) so the Black Sheep is curious about this chap's attempt to spend 11 days without sleep.

He hopes that raw fruit and vegetables will enable him to keep going and try and break the existing world record, but in my experience caffeine and of course a copy of Farmers Weekly will do the trick to keep you awake!!!

It's official - geese are trying to enter the technological age!!!

Sick of their reputation as beasts that attack random people for bread-related snacks, a trio of geese have decided that mobile phones are the way forward for the species, taking one off a scared student before running away.

Maybe they want to communicate with friends down the river or maybe they want to order a pizza. Either way, the geese are on the war path so beware with your Blackberry as you pass any lakes!!!!

For those of you dear Sheep readers that don't know, this week is National Be Nice to Nettles Week.

I know i know,you must be kicking yourself for forgetting such a prestigious event, but here at the Black Sheep we like to think of ourselves as information providers, as well as just being plain ridiculous.

The purpose of the week is promote the 'humble nettle' as an essential part of the natural world, and not a weed that made look like a beetroot when i fell into a nettle patch at nine years old.

I am slightly suspicious however, when an event planned to advertise the week asks people to 'come in long trousers and long-sleeved tops for this event'. That to me is like reminding people not to wear red to bull fight.

Anyway, hear is a nice way to embrace the nettle by producing a nice soup.

Here in the FW towers we pride ourselves on our physical prowess; you can often find us in the local pub playing darts, back-gammon and other such physical sports.

We have found a more unusual way of weight control however, using a computer game console called the Nintento Wii.

This 'Wii Weightless plan' allows you to lose weight by interacting with the computer. One person on the regime is even blogging about his experiences.

I think i would prefer to go for a walk to be honest but good luck to these guys.

Mr Europe Editor has been sent these two images of people who have unusual methods of carrying large quantities of material. I think the grass rider is trying to camouflage his/herself, but unfortunately the undergrowth 'look' is unworkable in a city street. As for the egg guy, it sure looks impressive, but if he has to stop quickly he is definately going to get egg on his face (sorry but it was too good of a pun to ignore)

We haven't had an unsual shaped fruit (or a vegetable) for a while, so here is the story of a tomato (which i think is a fruit!!) that is shaped like Mickey Mouse. It's not like our usual rude standard, but any fruit shaped like a Disney character is worthy of respect.

The office today has been like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory, brimming with chocolate and sweets (well digestives and pear drops) that we have gorged ourselves on.

All day members of the team have been pretending to come over to the news team (who have all the sweets) with 'serious agricultural issues', before returning with a sneaky chocolate digestive in their pocket.

I have of course used no such tactic, just bounding up and stealing a biscuit before running off before Miss Deputy News Editor throws something at me.

A nice story of how two gay flamingos have become foster parents after taking on an abandoned chick after their parenting skills were seen to be top notch.

Check out this picture of a moonbow over Yosemite Falls, taken by photographer Brent Gilstrap.

See we can bring you beauty here at the Black Sheep.

I found an unwelcome eight-legged visitor in my sock drawer this morning. Not being a fan of spiders, I felt incredibly proud of myself when (albeit trembling and sweating) I scooped it into a glass and took it outside it into my garden.

My triumph was short-lived though. While I wasn't exactly expecting to be applauded when I shared my gallant tale at the office, I didn't expect quite so much laughter from the Farmers Weekly team.

"It was only the size of a Smartie?" Mr Web Editor asked incredulously. "You ought to be careful - it's probably laid eggs on your sports socks," he joked. (At least, I hope he was joking. Maybe I should check when I get home this evening...)

Mr Farmlife has been gushing over his kittens since he got them last week.

Pictures of his new pets in various cute poses have been circulating the office over the past few days, resulting in lots of "aaahs" coming from members of the FW team (Miss Poultry World in particular).

This afternoon, weekend visits were even arranged to see the pair, named Parsley and Nutmeg.

It seems as though it's not just Mr Farmlife who has given unusual names to his feline friends.

Mr Foodchain lovingly call's his housemate's cats 'Black Cat' and 'Other Cat', and when pressed admitted he couldn't actually remember their real names.

But my favourite names went to Mr News Editor, who, banned by his family from calling his cats Steve and Mike, instead plumped for Greg and Fergal.

Sadly I'm allergic to cats, which means I'll never have the opportunity to bestow a bizarre name upon one. Perhaps I should get a goldfish instead - I wonder if it'd appreciate being called Fluffy.

The following may offend dog owners or vegetarians. If you are a dog loving vegetarian i definitely wouldn't read the following:

This performance artist shows a more extreme method of protesting. The office has been discussing about how much meat you would get from a Corgi but i would say that all Corgi's that i have seen are chubby little things. Miss Business Reporter said that she thinks it will taste like lamb but i am not sure.

After last night's Corgi story shocked the office, we were even more horrified by the animal kingdom's response...they brought out the hamster, and then an elephant or two. Lord help us!!!!