Whatever happened to the hole in the ozone layer?

But quite a lot of people have been saying the same thing. I always lay awake all night and then drop off at about 5.30am. My best mate, Julian, says this is down to the subsonic soundwaves than the Russians broadcast to disrupt our sleep patterns. He's not normally a conspiracy theorist - in fact this is an outlandishly wacky suggestion for him so it must be true.

Anyway. It has been rather hectic at work this week and my mind has been racing every night. Apart from Tuesday when I got up at 4.30am and went jogging. I might have to consider a pyschological examination soon, this is very out of character for me. Obviously all part of the Russian mind control.

Anyway. While I was laying awake in bed last night I started thinking about the ozone layer and its hole. You don't hear much about it these days do you. Was it just an late eighties phenomenon. Has it just gone out of fashion? Or did aerosol sales die with the eighties and its chronic hairstyles (think Dynasty and hairspray rockers like Europe and Def Leppard) and allow said hole to heal itself. Maybe it's been plugged with carbon.

I will do a bit of research on this when I get a moment. Perhaps the hole is gaping as much as ever but has lost the publicity war with carbon. If this is the case I can't imagine relationships are very friendly between the two. I like to imagine the poor old hole wearing pretty much the same bitter expression that a Cornetto would have if it was introduced to a Almond Magnum at a drinks party.