There's no doubt about it, those Filipinos and Bangladeshis who have had a hard day queueing up for their rice rations will be able to sleep easier in their beds tonight, secure in the knowledge that Flash Gordon has been holding a 'summit' at Number 10 with the supermarket bosses and Peter Kendall. 

Fresh from a triumphant visit to the USA, where he took care to avoid confusion with another contemporaneous visitor by not wearing white and by not being chauffeured around in a gas guzzling 'Flash Mobile',  Gordon feels that he is at the height of his powers. 

Look how his last budget 'simplified' the tax system by abolishing the lower rate band and forcing lower income families to pay more tax and apply to join the benefit culture to claim it back in tax credits - too bad about the 5.3 million workers who don't qualify!  He only has to think back to last March when the Labour MPs cheered him in the House to realise what a master he was of the Treasury job.  Now he has the top spot, the whole world will marvel at his decisive and innovative approach to these problems.

Just look at Northern Rock - what a masterly handling of the 'banking crisis' to have come to the decision to nationalise the bank after only three months of dithering and now he has extended help to those unfortunate needy who need to re-mortgage, having borrowed six times their income against 140% of their property value by letting we poor taxpayers guarantee the worth of the banks' lending follies.

Anyway - enough of the praise of our glorious leader, the summit will obviously produce some interesting and innovative ideas on how to solve the crisis, even if no-one can decide what the crisis actually is.. Is it that there is too little food to go round, or is it that it is too expensive for poor people to buy?

Here's my guess at what the options might be:

Gordon's wish list - Food is too expensive and as it is not my chums in the Private Equity companies which are making the profits but the undeserving farmers and landowners we must take steps to stop it at once.  I propose that with effect from midnight tonight, all farm land in the UK will be nationalised and held in trust by Northern Rock.  All agricultural businesses will be compulsorily purchased and will be managed by the expert hands of DEFRA.   We will encourage our European colleagues to take similar action.  To help the fair distribution of food to the needy public, the Single Farm payment will be subject to 100% modulation and grants awarded to deserving supermarkets to open up further branches.

Supermarkets wish list - Food is too cheap and it is quite unreasonable to expect retailers to continue a pile it high sell it cheap ethos in the face of the needs of starving Africans.  We would like to see the abolition of the laws regarding cartels so that we can agree amongst ourselves a fair price for produce.  We would like to reduce consumption whilst maintaining income with such special offers as By One Get Another for Double.  We think that there should be alterations to labelling to encourage consumers to 'eat it all up, there's a child in Africa would be grateful for that'.  We would also like a change in the law to ensure that we could stop wastage by abolishing 'sell by' and 'use by' dates.  Let's make it clear that food safety is the responsibility of the eater not the vendor!

NFU wish list - Food s too expensive to produce in the UK so we should aim to help reduce the cost and administrative burden on farmers and growers.  We would hope that the government would recognise this by minimising the bureaucracy and unnecessary costs imposed on the industry.  Firstly 'red' diesel should have all duties removed and farmers and their extended families should be allowed to use it in any 4x4, which incidentally should have to pay no road tax.  Such restrictive practises as the Nitrates Directive should be abolished immediately and the overburdening animal identification systems which mean they are more traceable than terrorists, should be abolished forthwith.  All environmental restrictions involved in SFP regulation should be lifted immediately and those inspectors involved in monitoring could be re-deployed to advise farmers how they could get extra production by ripping up hedges etc..

Anyone have other suggestions?

My suggestion...

that everyone reads this. Very funny!

It is only funny until you realize that Jacobus understands how people in government think, and his post might not be that far off what the government proposes. 

 

Luckily you are in Europe so some of your current government ideas will no doubt be modulated!

Phew, that was close.

Bon courage, looks like you may need it.

JC.

 

 

 

 

Bit late now, i have just worked out i do not have to produce anything to get the single farm payment.

so cheerio to the loss making sucklers and sheep, hello to oats and hay for all my new horsey  neighbours recently moved from the city.

Oh!, and thank you Gordon for the nice tax rebate 

Jacobus:

Gordon's wish list - I propose that with effect from midnight tonight, all farm land in the UK will be nationalised and held in trust by Northern Rock. 

Excellent i will have done my 37.5 hours by wednesday lunchtime. will gordon be sending someone in to do wednesday afternoon and thursday to sunday?

Jacobus:

To help the fair distribution of food to the needy public, the Single Farm payment will be subject to 100% modulation

i recon 200% will be nearer!

Jacobus the old political maxim of "In defeat malice, in victory revenge!" applies here. As we do not put politicians responsible for monumental errors heads on spikes any more we should do the next best thing. Can I nominate you to be the one to ritually burn Margaret Beckett's caravan.

 

After that token of contrition from the government I have decided to ask for 2 V8td Range Rovers (or cash equivalent) to consider (only consider mind) increasing production.

Jacobus,If they are so benevolent and do Nationalise the Farms they might have some money from the first years Harvest to pay for the Shares they stole from Northern Rock.They would have to pay Farmers as Civil Servants plus Pension, Oh how those Socialists would cry in their Milk [sorry bad Pun there] and we could all watch as yields fell and costs rose year on year.

He his-self:

Can I nominate you to be the one to ritually burn Margaret Beckett's caravan.

I think burning is a bit tame - I would like to donate it to Messrs Clarkson, Hammond and May to devise a more spectacular fate.  How about an experiment to see how much CO2 your Range Rovers could create in the time it took the Beckett home-from-home to freefall from a Hercules at 20,000feet?

tarquin:

Excellent i will have done my 37.5 hours by wednesday lunchtime. will gordon be sending someone in to do wednesday afternoon and thursday to sunday?

Bring it on, no more nights out with cows calving either, it will be the night shifts job

Here's whqt was actually agreed at the meeting which had more of an international dimension, than domestic. Here in the UK the main points seem to be there there will be a review on our use/stragety for biofuels and they are also pumping in some money into agricultural research in order to boost yields. Of course, there is also a line about reviewing the CAP which is costing British consumers £3.5 bn through higher prices tec

 

The UK's support of biofuel production will be carefully examined in light of its impact on worldwide food production.

A joint statement released at the close of yesterday's meeting of leading experts, scientists, food producers and retailers said that the use of biofuels would be more selectively supported in the future. 

If the review shows that a change of approach is needed, the UK will push for change in EU biofuels targets.

The meeting in the Cabinet Room inside 10 Downing Street addressed the short and longer-term factors causing increased food prices at home and abroad and possible policy solutions.

The attendees agreed to work towards an international strategy through the G8 and world trade discussions, and continue to support the world's poorest people. Domestic price rises must also be tackled, they said.

Update on Downing Street Food Prices Summit

The Prime Minister, Alistair Darling, Douglas Alexander and Hilary Benn today hosted a meeting of leading experts, scientists, food producers and retailers to address the growing world food crisis. The meeting addressed the short and longer-term factors causing increased food prices at home and abroad and possible policy solutions.

Among the issues that were discussed were:

1. We will work in the G8 for an international strategy. An international strategy will need to include: more and better support for agricultural and rural development in the poorest countries; more and better research into methods for increasing yields and productivity; a review of the wider economic and environmental impacts of biofuel production; commitment to increase social protection programmes which take people out of long-term dependency on food aid; consideration on how to maximise the effectiveness of IMF and World Bank support; and reform of relevant international institutions.

2. We will increase support to the poorest. In addition to the £50m per year we already spend on social protection and safety net programmes in Africa, the UK has today pledged an extra £30m to support the World Food Programme, and extra £25m to Ethiopia for their national safety net programme. We will work to encourage other donors to make additional humanitarian assistance available and monitor the need to step up support.

3. We will work together to address domestic price rises. The Government has called on consumer groups, food producers, manufacturers and retailers to consider how we can collectively meet the challenges posed by the global food crisis.

4. We will increase research into improving yields. The UK has today announced new funds for agricultural research over the next five years. This will be critical if agricultural production is to keep pace with increased demands for food.

5. We will work to achieve a successful WTO deal, including a substantial 'aid for trade' package to help build the trading capacity of the poorest countries. The WTO round offers a major opportunity to increase trade flows in agricultural (and other) goods, particularly for developing countries. We want a WTO deal which reduces significantly reduces agricultural tariffs and trade distorting subsidies. High transport costs also push up local food prices and restrict trade in Africa.

6. We will work within the EU to further reform the EU's Common Agricultural Policy (CAP), through the CAP Health check and the EU budget review. It is estimated that the CAP costs UK consumers £3.5 bn (2005) through higher prices. Reductions in EU agricultural tariffs and CAP reform would reduce the cost of food to EU consumers and increase the capacity of developing countries to produce and export agricultural commodities.

7. We will review our approach to biofuels. We need to look closely at the impact on food prices and the environment of different production methods and to ensure we are more selective in our support. If our UK review shows that we need to change our approach, we will also push for change in EU biofuels targets.

Attendees

• Prime Minister
• Rt Hon Douglas Alexander MP, Secretary of State for International Development
• Rt Hon Alistair Darling
• Rt Hon Hilary Benn MP, Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs
• Rt Hon Malcolm Bruce MP
• Prof John Beddington Chief Scientist
• Phil Bloomer, Oxfam
• Dr Mike Bushell, Syngenta
• Paul Collier, Oxford University
• Professor Ian Crute, Rothamsted Research Institute
• Jaqcues Diouf, Food and Agricultural Organisation, UN
• Andrew Dorward, School of Oriental and African Studies
• Lawrence Haddad, Institute of Development Studies
• Paul Hodson, European Commission Transport & Energy
• Donal Kaberuka, African Development Bank
• Reijo Kemppinen, Head of Mission, EC Rep of the UK
• Peter Kendall, National Farmers Union
• Justin King, Sainsbury's
• Simon Maxwell, ODI
• Jill Johnstone, National Consumer Council
• David Mepham, Save the Children
• Kanayo Felix Nwanze, Vice President - IFAD
• Ruth Rawling, Cargill plc
• Josette Sheeran, World Food Programme
• Stefan Tangermann, OECD Trade & Agriculture Directorate
• Goran Trapp, Morgan Stanley
• Joachim von Braun, Director General IFPRI Inter Food Policy Institute Research

 

Sounds like enough hot air to keep someone warm next winter.

Sufficient U turns to satisfy Sebastien Loeb's fans.

Does anyone really think they can make any difference?

How about encouraging young scientists to get a decent education by providing good facilities, free tuition and a bit of recognition at the end of their studies.

Million times more effective than all their tripe they continue to spout at us.

Bon courage,

JC. 

Before Christmas the politicians and poverty experts were saying that food prices needed to improve for poor third world farmers so that they could improve food production, the prices are improving so whats the problem?

Did the clever fools not realise that it would have to lead to increased food prices for consumers. Were they never taught about economics.

Or is it as my grandfather used to say about University educated people,

Tha Knows owt bout nowt,and nowt bout owt

Exactly right cavey.  Oxfam was raising hell about our US farm subsidies, how they kept grain and cotton too cheap for farmers in third world nations to grow, contributing to poverty and world hunger....now grain is high, and it is contributing to poverty and world hunger.  How can that be, both ways???  Your grandfather I think was right on the mark.

Don't know if you have heard in the UK, the Canadian government is trying to buy out some of the sow herd, 10% I think.  I heard today, and (perhaps Ron Gelbvieh can tell us more),  the sows will be gassed, and not enter the food chain.  Seems a pitiful waste when world hunger is center stage. 

This nationalisation sounds like a good idea.

Iwould rather have the government as a landlord any day.

         No, No, No, Glasshouse, nor Tesla (in another thread).  Nationalisation of agriculture and agricultural land is at best Fool's Gold. If I have to choose the simplest reason, in one word "Incentive" or the lack of it. Okay, if you are money motivated and little else gives you pleasure in this world then by all means give it a try. I am with Kansas here, there would be a dead body to lift off this farm before the Government gained possession. I have spend 30 years paying a morgage costing £440000 to buy this place. That would buy you guys a lot of beer, holidays, cars and good times I suppose, if that is all you want, Yes, Tesla, they, the taxpayer, could pay bonus or incentive payments to ensure (hopefully) production ( and they would have to, to make it begin to work); but why pay for that when they are already getting that for nothing?

          To be positive there are places for nationalisation. There probably are places in agriculture and agricultural land in many parts of the world, (maybe even some in Europe). It would be interesting to hear from anyone of situations where this actually takes place to great success (in agriculture).

Has anyone else seen this piece in today's Times? Interesting analysis of the current situation.

Get farmers to farm? How very radical

Ally r, you misread me, i said" government as a landlord"

This is pie in the sky, but i am not advocating state farms, just a change of landlord in scotland, and get these grasping , whining lairds of our back.

Let us get on with farming, without constant fear of eviction, or having our improvements stolen and rented back to us..

The land agents who used to work for the department of agriculture in administering their estates were well thought of , unlike the clowns of smiths gore etc.

           Glasshouse, I am just sorry that you have landed up with a bad landlord, and I'm in no doubt you are not alone in that. Assuming that you are a good tenant, your landlord will be creating a loss to himself as well. It is very foolish for a landlord to have a tenant and not take a positive and constructive attitude to working with his tenant to the benefit of both parties.

           I am a little worried about your other points:

glasshouse:

Let us get on with farming, without constant fear of eviction, or having our improvements stolen and rented back to us..

as these should be clearly taken care of in the lease and improvements by the tenant recorded (where necessary) and subject to compensation if and when necessary. Certainly, Dept agents should be true to the text and the tenant shouldn't go wrong there, but it should be the same with a private landlord.  Unfortunately, I think it goes wrong when the land values escalate and the landlord feels he is not getting a good rate of return for his investment, especially where he has lost his right to vacant possession. That, however, is no excuse for his shifting the goal posts in the middle of the game, and the tenant should have statutory protection against foul play.

AllyR points out the exact reason private ownership is most productive, we have a high personal stake in our farms continuing to produce.  That is why, at least over here, the wife goes to work, we drive 10 and 20 year old cars and trucks, in many cases the husband works a 9-5 job and then comes home and farms.  If we work a 12 or 14 hour day, there is no overtime.  What do we do when we do make a little money? Reinvest it back into the farm.  If wheat is cheap for 10 years, most of us just keep growing wheat.  If cattle are cheap and our land is best suited to cattle, we keep raising cattle.

Put the land in the hands of the likes of Tesco and Wal Mart, and you will still have the people working it getting by on little money, but you will have taken away any incentive they have to put forth extra effort. Moreover, if growing wheat won't make money, then perhaps the land will become a housing development, a golf course, a Christmas tree farm.  Those companies are not going to be involved in farming because their grandpa farmed and they want to, they are in it for one reason only, to make money. 

There is an insurance ad on TV from time to time featuring a farm family from South Dakota.  In it, the family members state, in a nutshell, they have insurance to protect the farm because it is who they are, it is all they have, it is what they have worked for for generations.  That mindset is a powerful incentive that a state owned farm would not have in play.

With regard to the Times article, doesn't FW have enough stroke to get an article in the Times?  I have several thoughts about that article I will have to wait until later in the day to share, but it is the theme over here as well, people completely ignore all of the years of cheap farm prices.  There is another article from yesterday that says the era of cheap food is over....that is what needs to be concentrated on from the farm sector, that we did indeed have an era of comparitively cheap food. 

 

Unfortunately for the EU taxpayer, the reform of the CAP was a fudge more intent on capping the budget than anything else.

To keep my French and German colleagues happy substantial subsidies remain, to keep the UK happy they aren't capped and so it goes on and on and on!

With a courageous governance and responsive management there should now be no subsidies for arable production. That money should not be channelled into another box of the CAP but given back to the taxpayer so they have more real disposable income.

The two principals that good governance is less government and that you can't buck the market seemed to have been understood and accepted after the Regan & Thatcher years only to be ignored since, shame.

Bon courage,

JC. 

kansasfarmer:

With regard to the Times article, doesn't FW have enough stroke to get an article in the Times?

Not sure. They might be tempted by something if it were in Jane King's name.

The fact is that even under Thatcher, the overall size of government in the UK still managed to increase, if at a slower rate than the eras before or after.  It is the natural tendancy of bureacracies to bloat until they starve the societies they parasitise.  This happened several times in Chinese history, in Ancient Egypt and elsewhere.  Each time a state of anarchy and general misery ensues.  I fear ours is beginning to creak towards another fall.

 

A few days ago on FWI's home page I saw he trailer for a thread entitled Flash Gordon, saviour of the Universe - World 'Food Crisis' solved? and my very first thought was, Sounds like Jacobus ..... How right I was and I chuckled as I read his contribution. I have enjoyed every contribution since then.

Looking at Isabel's report on the outcome of the meeting between Flash Gordon and the esteemed worthies of Dowing Street, it appears that stategy has won the day over tactics. One can however, excuse Politicians focusing on strategy rather than tactics because that is what they think are elected to deal with. From what I read the stategic approaches agreed were as follows:

• Possibly aid to help farmers in less developed countries
• Discussions with the WTO about freeing markets for farmers from those countries
• Discussions with the EU about reform of CAP
• Talks with the UK food supply chain
• Review of previous decisions regarding bio-fuels
• More research into improving yields

However, given that 60% of all food leaving the farm gate is 'wasted' before it gets into someones mouth, there appears to be scope for some tactical action to curtail the problem before the stategic thinking by Flash Gordon takes effect.

FWI readers have much to offer in this regard, and I give below some of the practical steps they have suggested that could be taken without the necessity to hold strategic discussions with international bodies of dubious worth and intent.

1. Review of red tape to eliminate much that diverts time and energy away from growing crops/stock to filling in records or developing unecessary plans.
2. Review of H&S criteria to ascertain how we can reduce the reject rate of product because of miniscule risk of minor bodily upset due to deterioration or disease.
3. Review criteria of product selection that currently means only uniformly coloured and shaped product is packaged and presented for sale
4. Review of sell by dates
5. Education of public in 'How to trust their own sense of smell, taste, touch, sound and sight.
6. Reduction in public funding to bodies whose activities reduce the availability of land for horticultural or agricultural use
7. Reduction in public funding to any body or organisation which campaigns for increased regulation
8. Change of rules/regulations which currently prevent 'waste' food being used for animal feed
9. Banning the disposal of any food stuff into land fill
10. Introduction of Caveat Emptor for shops selling surplus food to individuals, and exemption from prosecution if they give it away
11. Household Rate reduction for every home that can demonstrate the growing of vegetables/product for consumption or sale

Would any reader care to add to this list?

Finally I hope readers will indulge a little silliness on my part; Can I further suggest, that only men or women who have kept a pig and then eaten it should be able to ascend to the office of Prime Minister.