Great excitement in the office today because we've just discovered a horse called Farmer Frank is running in the 4.50 at Catterick today. It's a six year old so it probably wasn't named after our Farmer Frank - but we're backing it anyway. I'm risking £5... 

PS This comes with a health warning. We know nothing about racing so don't assume this is a tip! 

Farmer Frank's running at Catterick today raises two questions:

1. With his current form of two wins in his last six outings (134-B1), and as hot tip on the Today programme this morning, does this mean it would be profitable to follow his career on the turf?

2. Is he, in fact, a gelding?

Thank you for highlighting my current form. I have been on a bit of a winning streak and did indeed win on my last two outings (in what I'd like to stress is a very competitive pub darts league). 

I'm not sure what the Today programme is - but it obviously has a more relaxed editorial policy than Farmers Weekly. Last time I tried writing about my hot tip in my column they told me it wasn't suitable subject matter for a family publication. 

The horse lost. And so did I.

I understand he led at the start - a case of peaking to soon? - a bit ironic if thats the case, as it is something Farmer Frank has given advice on if I remember rightly?

No one is more disappointed than me - I had 20 quid on that horse. That's money I'd earmarked for a present for the Mrs for our anniversary, too. Well, £5 of it was. The other £15 was going on baccy.

I've just been looking on the Racing Post website (see, you can teach an old dog new tricks) for the low down on the horse called Farmer Frank.

It says of his performance in the race: Failed to get home after kicking clear some way out. Which is ironic because that's pretty much what happened to me last Saturday after drinking that scrumpy.

Encouragingly, the Post also says: He's not one to write off just yet. Which I've also been telling the ladies for years!

Forget the 4.50 at Catterick, it's the Gold Cup at Cheltenham I'm interested in today.

My mate Reg reckons Denman's a sure-fire bet. There again, he's picked a few terrible horses in the past. He also lost his house and his wife because of his gambling habit.

It wasn all bad news for Reg then ! 

I dont think it will be Denmans year this year though Frank.

I knew I shouldn't have listened to Reg. Kauto Star won it!