I've just found out that the hotel where myself and a few colleagues are staying in Blackpool with the Young Farmers this weekend is popular with transvestites. I think I need to digest this news before I comment on it...
April 2009 Archives
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Seeing as we've been talking about TV ads, here's a bit of news concerning one with an agricultural flavour.
C4 have agreed to temporarily axe the ad showing the burning bales of straw during harvest, for fears it could give would-be arsonists ideas. The NFU have been calling for the advertisement to be banned for some time...
I've put the link in to it above, because I'm pretty sure no Field Day readers are arsonists.
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The papers are full of stuff about pets becoming the latest victims of the credit crunch - apparently they're being increasingly abandoned by owners unable to afford to keep them.
According to The Independent, a cat costs more than £9000 over the course of its lifetime. Nine flippin grand. No wonder Parsley looks so smug.
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Is this me, or is there a pattern emerging here?
I seem to be being sent a lot (well, two) publicity shots featuring men holding sheep against blue skies.
First, to promote a lamb-naming competition for the Great Yorkshire show.
And now this one to raise awareness of Harper Adams open days.
The sheep in this shot was obviously non-plussed by the whole process and, like a subversive child surreptitiously flicking the Vs at the camera, is poking its tongue out.
Next time I've got a book coming out, I'll have to get myself a sheep. And find a blue sky!
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Philippa Vine, who I've mentioned before in connection with the super recipes she writes for Farmers Weekly, is well known for something else too - her family's famous Bluebell Walk. If you fancy seeing some of this year's bluebells and you're in or near Sussex, it's well worth a visit...
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This looks a bit like a scene out of one of my favourite films, Alive. The movie was about the plane-load of Uruguayan rugby players who crashed in The Andes in 1972 and eating each other. The book about the whole tragic, inspirational incident, written by Piers Paul Read, is also worth checking out.
But I digress. It's actually a shot of some Essex Young Farmers in training for the Three Peaks challenge.
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There was an earthquake in Cumbria today.
The quake, which registered 3.7 on the Richter Scale, shook the ground around Barrow, Carnforth and Kendal late this morning.
Geologists said an event of this size would have been unlikely to cause any real damage (there were no casualties or fatalities) but could have been felt by people.
One businessman in Ulverston (near the epicentre) was quoted in the local press as saying the tremor lasted about 15 seconds and was like a "deep roar".
He added: "Everyone in the hall definitely felt something. It was a heavy rumbling sound, like a wagon revving up, or a deep roar."
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I always think the sign of a good artist (and like I say, I'm no Waldemar Januszczak) is that you can instantly recognise them by their work.
It's like music: you hear Bono and it couldn't be anyone other than Bono. Ditto Elton John, Mick Jagger, Van Morrison.
The artist Thelwell is like this. This picture's just been sent to me and I knew immediately who it was by. I was emailed it to remind me about the new Thelwell exhibition. It now runs from Wednesday 13 May to Saturday 6 June.
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Is the humble eel having a renaissance?
As I've said before, I get taken out to lunch very rarely (hint hint!), but I had a lovely lunch today with eel for starters.
It's something I've seen on menus quite a few times in the last couple of years. Maybe it's come back into fashion...
For anyone who fancies trying it, here are some recipes from the uktv good food site.
I was at The Farmers Club, courtesy of those nice people at the charity RABI. They must have a new chef at The Farmers Club - the food was immeasurably better than the last time I ate there...
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A fire has swept through 1500 acres on Exmoor. Here's what the BBC had to say, plus there are some comments from someone who's been affected on the FWi forums.
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You know I mentioned the forthcoming Young Farmers weekend. Well I now feel very lazy, going there on the train. This lot are cycling to Blackpool from London.
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There's a photo of the palm civet in this slide show on the Telegraph's website.
There are some other great photos in there, too - something for everyone. Dressed-up dogs (which will please Mr Naylor no end), some real-life big cats and even a polar bear (yet more evidence, I'd suggest, to support my point that they're over-rated!)
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The public has obviously given up trying ot track down the real Beast of Bodmin, and turned its attention to something rather smaller - the 'little beast of Bodmin'.
You're not exactly going to confuse it with a marauding panther, are you. A badger, maybe or possibly even a fat ferret... Turned out to be a critter known as a palm civet.
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It might now have had more than 7 million views on YouTube, but the Extreme Shepherding video we've been covering on Field Day isn't, it seems, going down so well with animal rights campaigners.
The animal welfare group, Peta, has hit out at Samsung, who made the ad, claiming it's cruel to the sheep.
They'd written to the firm calling for the 'viral video' - which features a flock of sheep covered with LED lights being herded into an array of patterns on a Welsh hillside - to be axed from the internet.
"Get with the times and promote your new technology in more humane, modern ways," says Peta. "Less of the using living, sentient beings as inanimate props..."
With tens of thousands of new people watching the vid every day, I imagine Samsung will file the letter from Peta in the tray marked: Bin.
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Here's an interesting science story in New Scientist - a flourescent dog. More pictures in the Daily Mail.
At least you'd be able to find them if you were trying to get them in at night...
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I've just spoken to Nick Kent, the trainer who looks after Farmer Frank. Apparently the horse is owned and bred by a farmer, so I'm going to meet the pair of them (and of course the star himself, Frank) at the stables in Lincolnshire.
I reckon this horse could be destined for big things. "I wish I had a few more like him," was what the trained just said.
He might well be racing again in a couple of weeks at Aintree, so I'll keep you posted...
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Natural England and the National Trust issued a stark warning yesterday about the threat to Britain's orchards.
The organisations reckon more than half of England's small, traditional orchards have been grubbed up or built on since the 1950s, with some areas - such as Devon - having lost far more.
Launching a £500,000 project in a bid to halt the decline, they claimed that these crucial habitats for flora and fauna could vanish, bringing a huge loss of apple varieties, some unique to just a few square miles.
"Traditional orchards have been disappearing at an alarming rate and we are in real danger of losing these unique habitats," said the National Trust's David Bullock.
Under the two-year project, old orchards are being restored, rediscovered and mapped. Workshops will also be run to train people in skills such as pruning and grafting, and communities are being told how they can revive old orchards, plant new ones and market the fruit.
"Orchards bring people and wildlife together," says project manager Lucy Cordrey. "It's about food, the culture behind them, the heritage. They are magical places to be in."
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The tickets are reserved, the hotel's booked. Only just over a week and I'll be heading to Blackpool for the biggest Young Farmer get-together of the year.
After three days of working hard and playing hard last year at the event, I can't make my mind up whether it makes me feel 10 years younger or 10 years older.
This was one of the pictures we snapped at one of the fancy dress parties last year. Terrifying, wouldn't you agree?
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Seeing as it's asparagus time of year, Farmers Weekly's fantastic food writer Philippa Vine has come up with this lovely recipe for asparagus and quail's egg tarts. It makes four. Enjoy.
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For those of you interested in journalism and blogging, I've been a guest blogger for Adam on One Man and His Blog.
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It's St George's Day tomorrow so, if you like to mark the occasion (and I do), then have a good one.
Here are St George's Day recipe ideas on the BBC Good Food site.
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I wrote an article a little while back abuot a band called Sion.
If you're wondering why on earth I was writing about music (I mean, I'm no more Tony Parsons than I am Alfred Wainwright), it was because one of the members - a guy called Marc Burford - works on a farm.
Anyway, they've got a new single out called Not With Experience - you can listen to it and find out more about the band here.
Marc's a great bloke and I really hope the band hit the big time. I'll expect free tickets to all their gigs when they do!
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Farmer Frank romped home by three-and-a-half lengths. It was pure poetry.
I went to the bookies at 5pm, gave them some money, then went back at 7 and got what I'd given them along with some more. Genius. Why has no one thought of this before?
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When someone told me there was a horse called Farmer Frank racing at Catterick a while back, I put some money on him and lost.
He's out again tonight in the 6.30 at Towcester so I've had another little flutter. Will I never learn?
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A breed of cattle not seen in this country for many centuries has been brought back to Britain by a farmer.
There's another picture of the impressive-looking beasts in The Guardian.
The treatment this story received in another newspaper made me chuckle. The Metro, a free London rag not known for its serious analytical pieces, ran a piece under the headline: Giant Nazi Cows on the Loose in Britain.
And as if that ridiculous headline wasn't enough, it also used a picture of an entirely different breed of cow. And they wonder why journalists aren't trusted.
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You wouldn't think wombat poo could be put to such a productive use, would you...
Reminded me a bit of the This exhibition's crap post from a while back...
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Journalists and estate agents. They're the professions that people often cite as the least trustworthy.
When it comes to the most trusted, a new survey by Reader's Digest suggests that farming is among them.
Of the 1700 respondents, 82% trust farmers "a great deal" or "quite a lot".
The only professions to score higher were fire-fighters, airline pilots, pharmacists, nurses, doctors and teachers.
The survey also named Tesco as the most trusted food retailer in the country. While shoppers obviously adore Tesco, their farmer-suppliers are sometimes rather less enamoured with the retailer.
And with the firm posting record profits today, I expect there'll be more yet complaints from the agricultural community that the store is making cash by unfairly squeezing its suppliers'...
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Lambs are the latest recruits in a new advertising campaign which is being launched in the Lake District this spring.
The organisers of Lakes Alive, a new series of outdoor performances and street arts, are giving farmers across Cumbria little plastic coats to promote the events and to help protect the lambs from bad weather.
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If you look carefully at this photo, you'll spot a duck in it.
Richard Carter from Gloucestershire got in touch to tell us about this truly dedicated creature.
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A lot of people dub magpies the "rats of the avian world".
But calls to cull them have sparked an acrimonious row in the bird world.
The tv presenter Chris Packham is outraged by the idea.
Newspaper columnist Simon Heffer, however, says: "For the good of our wildlife, kill a magpie or six today: and feel free to take a jay or a crow with you while you are at it. The bunny-huggers will hate you, but our beautiful birds will be much in your debt."
Those two aren't going to be going out for a beer together any time soon...
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The pictures of President Obama's dog have proved a surprise hit - but The Telegraph's decided to go one better and put together a slide show of presidential dogs through history.
What about White House cats, that's what I want to know...
As for animals living in the seat of power on this side of The Atlantic, there was the famous cat Downing Street cat, Humphrey, succeeded more recently by Sybil...
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Remember Bella Hall, that nice lady who won our new columnist competition in Farmers Weekly?
Well here, even though it's not going to appear in the mag until next week, is her latest column:
Three things determine my husband's frame of mind: the weather, machinery and pigeons (commodity prices was the third, but currently it definitely is pigeons).
We were due to go out. Charlie had just recovered from chicken pox and then Will came down with a virus that knocked him for six.
I hadn't left the house for weeks (okay, I'm exaggerating, but you get the picture) and had taken up nursing as a full-time occupation, administering medicines and creams to anyone who came near me. Hence, David decided to take me out.
After years of experience, I known that being a mother and a farmer's wife greatly reduces the odds of a night out actually taking place. I also should have known better than to expect a relaxing evening.
The day in question hadn't started well for my husband. His early morning pot-shot out of the bedroom window at an unsuspecting pigeon had missed its target.
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I once knew a farmer who put a board up outside his house advertising his organic strawberries.
Only problem was, they weren't organic. He threw all sorts of fertilisers and chemicals at them. You'd have been hard pressed, frankly, to find less organic strawberries. But merely mentioning the word, he maintained, allowed him to add a few pence to the price.
This was, I should point out, a long time ago (I'm sure he wouldn't get away with it now) but it highlights how difficult it is to trust - and police - some of descriptions attached to food.
Alex Renton over on The Guardian's Word of Mouth blog has been posting on this very subject - in particular, in relation to the use of the word 'local'.
He makes some interesting points and he's certainly right about one thing: if you want to get genuinely local food (and support farmers by not letting the retailers take a big fat slice of the profits) then using farm shops is a good place to start.
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Amazing the things you find when you're ploughing - look what this County Tyrone man unearthed.
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The distances birds migrate are set to get even longer, according to this article in The Independent.
It's an amazing thing, migration - there again, it's not as if they have to contend with the British motorway network or anything...
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And there was me joking about how I was trying to emulate Alfred Wainwright.
I've got nothing on this kid. He's incredible.
A little bit of me thinks he should be doing the things any other self-respecting five-year-old does, like burning ants under magnifying glasses and upsetting girls by dangling worms in front of them, but you can't knock him.
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I don't like horses.
This is probably partly the result of seeing as horrible accident involving a motorbike and one as a kid - but that aside, I think they're ugly, clumsy, expensive wastes of grass.
That said, here's a heartwarming story about one from the Daily Mail.
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And it's not just dogs in wigs, either. Oh no. You get dogs in buckets on this website, too.
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This bloke, Joe Cornish, has been busy photographing landscapes for the National Trust. They're great pictures.
I wonder if he's taken any of Blea Tarn. That's one spot that's well worth the climb to, if you're ever in the Lake District.
And now I'll shut up before I sound like I'm trying to mimic Alfred Wainwright.
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Bit off piste, this post, so apologies. But I like tv ads,
And this one just gets me every time I see it. Something filmic about it, wuoldn't you say.
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Never mind North Korea.
More dog snaps form the White House in The Guardian. I particularly like the one where the little pooch is sticking his tongue out. Bo, he's called.
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A 96-year-old man has paid a return visit to Harper Adams 75 years after he was a student there.
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Is it me - or is there a striking resemblance between that Margaret off The Apprentice and EU farm commissioner Mariann Fischer Boel.
Bet you've never seen the two of them in the same room together, have you?
And as for that Nick, Alan Sugar's other cohort (who Margaret is pictured with here) - well one of his hobbies, apparently, is vintage tractors.
Spooky.


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I've blogged about the pending arrival of the White House dog before. Well here it is.
Apparently, it's got "a white chest and a rakish white goatee". Which sounds a little like how I used to look in my student days.
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I told you polar bears were over-rated. Look at this amazing picture of one biting some poor German woman.
You've got to question the actions of the bloke with the camera. I mean, if I saw someone getting mauled by a bear, I'm not sure my first reaction would be attempt to get the best photo I could!
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Here's something you may never have been to - a scarecrow festival.
The three-day one at Flamstead in Hertfordshire will again be displaying some clever creations on the afternoon of Friday August 21, and all day on the 22nd and 23rd.
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Remember farmer Frank, the politically incorrect rural agony uncle, who held a live surgery a while back? Well here's been at it again.
Q: Will you be taking part in Open Farm Sunday?
A: This is a great initiative, affording farmers the chance to welcome the public onto their land and communicate key messages in a bid to bridge the urban rural divide. That said, I'm damned if I want hordes of nasty townies swarming over the place, so No.
Q I've had a terrible spraying season and had no end of problems with my nozzles.
A I know the feeling.
Q I'm worried about doing my SFP forms. It's so bad that I can't sleep anymore. Help.
A Try reading the guidance notes - you'll be asleep in no time
Q Were you sad to hear about the demise of the Royal?
A What, the Queen's dead? No one ever tells me anything.
Q A friend of mine has incredibly bad breath. How can I broach this with him?
A It's probably a sensitive subject so be discreet. But there again, it might be quicker to just tell the guy he could fell a horse at 20 paces and leave some mouthwash in the tractor.
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Talking of books, that nice man Scott Pack (he used to be a bigwig at Waterstone's and now works in publishing) has had me as a guest blogger over on Me and My Big Mouth.
I wrote about (and it was partly Field Day readers' comments about my bent head that got me thinking about the subject) how ridiculous author photos (mine included) tend to be.
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I used to keep ferrets as a kid - but I think fewer people have them nowadays than years ago.
There must still be quite a lot of interest in them, however, if there's a market for books like this. It's published by Quiller.
I'd rather read it than the camping book.
I presume the author's middle name isn't Luther, incidentally...
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I never thought I'd sink to Matthew Naylor's level. He's made a whole blogging career out of dogs in fancy dress.
But if you can't beat them, join them, I figure. So here's a photo of one in a wig. And another one wrapped in towels.
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The Daily Telegraph has found what it claims to be the country's oldest working Aga.
Field Day regulars might remember the great Aga debate we ran a while back - with one rural B&B lady advocating the merits of them, and one farmer complaining about the faults of them...
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It was only the other day we were talking about Manx Loaghtans.
Well they've now been awarded Product of Designated Origin status on the Isle of Man (like Jersey Royal Potatoes, Whitstable Oysters and Newcastle Brown Ale).
Experts reckons this will pave the way for more of the island's farmers to convert to rearing the original island breed.
Unique to the area, the rare and ancient animal has been revived after nearing extinction in the 1960s.
It has a slower rate of growth than modern ones, taking 18 months to finish, as opposed to six months. But the lamb is low in fat.
I know I'm rambling now, but here's a little-known fact I learnt when I was living in Newcastle. Brown Ale got its nickname, Dog, because the old boys apparently used to tell their missuses they were nipping out to walk the dog when they were, in fact, going for a pint...
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I've been sent on some pretty rubbish assignments over the years. But an invite has just arrived to one that sounds a fantastic gig. It's for The World Cheese which runs from September 30 to October 4. Nothing desperately exciting about that, I thought, until I read where it's being held. Gran Canaria.
I wonder if I'll be able to persuade the boss to let me go.
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The Independent is launching its Great British Butterfly Hunt today. They're encouraging people to spot 58 varieties. They're even giving away a wall chart with the newspaper tomorrow.
Might be just as well to spot them now while you still can - an article in The Scotsman reckons populations of many species are plummetting.
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OK, one last one, then that'll be it for quirky animal stories for a while.
Check out these little critters on the Sun's website (the slideshow has some particularly good pictures).
They're servals, apparently.
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Seeing as we're on the subject of animals behaving oddly, they don't come much more odd than this: a cat and dog playing a musical instrument (you have to let the short advert play before the vid begins).
Couldn't help but wonder if it's all genuine, or whether there's been a bit of clever editing/electronic assistance, as per the extreme shepherding video.
Whatever, I might have to see if I can train Nutmeg to do something like this...
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First, it was aggressive behaviour from a sexually-confused peacock - now an ASBO swan.
Next you'll be telling me that squirrels carry guns.
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Rebranding exercises are usually a bad idea and a colossal waste of money - advocated only by marketeers who sit round big tables in swanky offices with trendy shoes and fat ties and stand to benefit with fees from the whole process.
So I'll be interested to hear about the success or otherwise of this rebranding of the humble pollack.
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I'd rather take poison than go camping.
I simply don't get it. Why one earth (on earth, geddit!) would anyone choose to sleep outside in the cold and rain, on the hard ground, surrounded by wild animals, getting stung/bitten by wasps/midges/snakes, and using toilet facilities that are pre-Victorian?
That said, if you're into that sort of thing - and a lot of people are - I think this would be a thoroughly good read.
It's full of practical easy-to-follow advice on everything from camp cooking and reading the weather to wild swimming and tent types.
You can find more details here.
Or you can post a comment on the subject and I'll send my copy of the book (it was a freebie, I didn't buy it) to the person who leaves the comment I like best.
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It's all kicking off in the world of chutney.
Competition was fierce at the first ever UK National Chutney Challenge competition last week at The Wynnstay Hotel in Machynlleth, mid Wales, with entries from across the UK jostling for the top places.
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I'm beginning to get bored with big cat stories now. I think I might only blog about them from now on if they've got a photo of the alleged beast with them. Here, however, is one from Norfolk this morning.
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OK, a little bit of housekeeping.
I was away in Lanzarote last week, hence my absence from this blog. Thank you, to those of you who've asked, I did have a lovely time. I am now slightly red, but should go back to being pale by lunchtime tomorrow.
I see there's also been some debate about the new photo of me. Mopsa, who writes the Ramblings blog, reckons it looks like I've injured my neck (possibly a squirrel bite, she suggests), while Sally agrees it's not my best look, and Cavan who edits Countryfile's website reckons my head looks like it's about to fall off. Matthew Naylor, meanwhile, commented that it looks like I've been punched.
At this rate, I may be forced to change it. I might tilt the other way next time...
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The Daily Mail is taking a break from "asylum seekers will render your house worthless and your pension fund empty" stories with these two articles, which may be of interest to Field Day readers.
Another alleged big cat photo and a desert island dog.
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A butcher on a bike might be a rare sight these days, but this summer will see more than 20 butchers and farmers dust off their wheels for a marathon ride from London to Paris.
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Talking of tv, I hear there's a new series about to start on BBC Four that sounds interesting.
Mud Sweat and Tractors - the story of agriculture begins on Wednesday April 15th at 9pm.
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Just heard from the gallery holding the Thelwell exhibition. If you're thinking of going, be aware the starting date has been postponed to May 13.
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I was talking about Matt Baker the other day - and I now see he's been interviewed in The Independent. I was particularly pleased to see that he counts Farmers Weekly among his desert island media. A man of taste, obviously!
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At first I thought it was a late April Fools joke.
But no - researchers really have produced a report called "Potatoes: A choice for Life".
The report examines the "typical meal repertoires of consumers, what influences their choice of meals and how they differ throughout their lifestages."
If you're still awake, the document concludes that "Older-families and the retired over-index on their consumption of potatoes."
Which I think means older people are more likely to eat lots of spuds. Youngsters, apparently, don't like them so much. Unless they are crisps or chips.
The Potato Council said it commissioned the research to improve the way potatoes are marketed.
That might be so, but why they can't speak in plain English, I've no idea.
Johann Tasker
(standing in for Tim Relf)
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