¬ Still searching ¬

3 September 1999




LOOKING FOR LOVE INTHESMALLADS

¬ Love found ¬

I met my husband as a direct result of an advertisement I placed in your personal column in the Oct 14, 1994, issue.

I received around 70 replies to my advertisement, asking to meet a farmer to share country life and fun. I was overwhelmed with the response. Some of the replies came from as far afield as Canada and Germany. You obviously have a widespread readership.

The four-line advertisement led me to a meeting with my husband. We are now happily married and have a little son.

I had found it very difficult in the past to find a partner who shared my love of the outdoors and animals. farmers weekly proved the ideal solution.

Name and address supplied.

We met thanks to farmers weekly, by writing to Barbara Hargreaves of the Home Section (now Farmlife).

I put a letter in the Sept 16 1960 issue, with the heading "A farmers daughter". I received an excellent response and had 58 replies, from all over the British Isles.

I chose to write to a farmers daughter from Oxon, and kept corresponding and meeting until we married in August 1963. We have a daughter and son and three grandchildren.

We spent 35 happy and busy years at the farm which was sold in May 1998, we are now living semi-retired and getting used to a new way of life.

Both of us, being only children, found it more difficult to mix and meet people our own age, and were always busy working so this was the best way to meet for us.

Alfred and Beryl Gillett

Woodham House, Downside Road, Backwell, Bristol.

In 1974 I was about 35-years-old and my friends were all married or settled. I was talking with our local character – mole catcher/rat catcher/helper out man.

Because he knew so many people in our countryside I suggested he might be able to arrange an introduction to someone suitable for me.

A few months later, he organised a meeting between me and a brother and sister at our local branch NFU dinner and things seemed to fit together. After that my wife and I married in 1976 and are still together. My friend then enjoyed the notoriety of also being a match-maker.

Name and address

supplied.

¬ Love lost ¬

I have never seen Country Living magazine, but I can rather imagine its readership.

I am not a farmer – I am a single female, aged 50, and I have replied to adverts from farmers and advertised myself.

I have always worked with animals and have travelled a lot. I have loved all the jobs (and animals) that I have had. I have had boyfriends but have never been too concerned to make things permanent. I was able to do what I liked because I had my parents house as a base.

After my father died I moved home to look after my mother. I then worked in horticulture – my other main interest.

I knew that there would come a point, when mother went, when I would need to settle down somewhere and I wanted more than just a job. So I put an ad in FW and had a good response.

I met a lovely chap with a small dairy farm, just the sort of place I liked working in. He was single, same age and his parents had recently died. I was still living with mother but I went down to see him whenever I could. We got on brilliantly well. I kept the house and garden in order, helped with the milking and other jobs around the place. We came to an agreement that Id move in when mother died. He varied between talking of marriage and saying he was too old for marriage.

After mothers funeral we (myself, sisters and brothers) set about selling the house. Right at the final moment, when I was ready to move down to him, he backed out – in fact he didnt tell me, he just became unavailable until I got the message.

I spent over a year in lodgings with my furniture etc in store (very expensive). I was trying to find a live-in job where I could take everything with me. I spent a lot more money looking at different places around the country, but nothing felt as if it would suit me for very long.

Finally, three years ago, I bought the house Im in now. I have work and I have friends, but have no real attachment to either. I have advertised since Ive been here and have met some lovely people, but its not that easy.

What I cant find is someone who I could really be friends with and could work with. Most of the farmers I have met have got settled, solo routines and their image of a wife or whatever is a lady indoors on call. When they reply to ads I dont think that they have thought things out at all.

I have also met other females who are looking for farmer-husbands. A common comment from ladies is that the men want everything (housekeeper, etc) for nothing.

Several farmers I have met have said that other ladies whom they have been in contact with just want a life of luxury.

I am sure these people can be "matched up" from adverts but, in general, hard-working farmers dont seem to have the social ability to handle such situations very well. Nor do I. I am no good at dealing with people; thats why I work with animals.

Name and address

supplied.

¬ Still searching ¬

Has it occurred to anyone that countrywomen have difficulties too meeting compatible partners? I am not a farmer, but from a farming stock/background. I have advertised in your personal column on two separate occasions, all to no avail in the past decade. I have yet to meet a genuine, sincere, loyal, straight, unbaggaged, normal, humorous bachelor farmer who genuinely wants to settle down. In

addition I also joined a

register for country folk last year and received one reply from a 67-year-old farmer. I am in my early 40s.

Theres no hope any more for me. Yet, I consider myself to be a real catch. I can turn my hand to many skills – painting and decorating, sewing, and I am an excellent cook, wine-maker and gardener. Finally, to add to this I am very pretty with a respectable caring disposition. No doubt there are many more ladies similar to myself. I am completely single, no baggage on board, no ties, free and available. So what on earth is wrong with society? Why cant I meet these lonely farmers that Country Living says are out there?

Jenny Parker

(Address supplied.)

In the personal column of a recent issue of FARMERS WEEKLY one hopeful advertises as follows: "Blonde, intelligent, attractive in need of loving and spoiling." She proceeds to describe the perfect man.

Any aspiring farmers wives need to be warned that it is the farmer who will expect to be loved and spoiled.

Since the BSE crisis and the fact that the EU is determined to bankrupt the British farmer, he finds it difficult to (even) be polite.

The blonde lady must be

joking.

Katie Williams

Withington House, Wormbridge, Hereford.

As a service to readers

advertising for a partner in our Personal column we are offering a special rate during Sept only. Place your ad (max 25 words) for just £25+VAT which

includes our confidential box number service.

Tel: 0208 652 3222

Following the media attention on lonely farmers, we asked readers how they met the

love of their lives and a surprising number said it was through advertising for a partner.

Some found happiness, others are still looking, as their letters tell


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