Alasdair Boden: Countryside Stewardship gives me a headache

I’m dyslexic. I have a low attention span, I am highly energetic and I enjoy being active outdoors.
But I do not handle paperwork well – particularly details and numbers.
Which is where managing land turns from the perfect occupation to the perfect hell.
See also: Alasdair Boden: ‘Accidental’ farmers bring fresh ideas
One our greatest incentives to buying our land was to help restore what was a fairly trashed parcel, with the reinstatement of hedgerows, rotational grazing and restoration of species-rich meadows.
Countryside Stewardship (CS) ticks all those boxes. So we went to apply, but within five minutes I had to lie down.
To plant a hedgerow (BN11) – a fairly easy visual environmental win for the government – you will require BN3 or BN4 as well as TE1, unless you want a fruity TE3 (no idea what happened to TE2).
But first you’ll need a double FG1 spaced 2.4m apart, as per the finer details.
Once this has been done, you can use CHRW1, 2 and/or 3… I say “and/or” because, to be honest, I really don’t have a clue.
When the government announced the end of the Basic Payment Scheme, it said not to worry about loss of subsidies as it will be offering top-ups and stacking – baffling in itself.
Then last September, the government’s Farming and Countryside Programme revealed a £358m underspend of the agriculture budget for the past three years.
Why? Because the whole system is so confusing nobody is applying.
What Defra wants to achieve could be groundbreaking, and while it puzzles over why more farmers aren’t applying (aside for the fact it abruptly paused applications), we farmers have the answer.
Keep it simple – and have humans that we can speak to.
I’ve had to employ Awesome Abi, a university graduate, to help weave my way through the detail – at an additional cost.
As for me, I’m off to plant the last of this year’s TE1s in the BN11 between the FG1.